Holyagnostic

The Unicorn Chronicles Chapter Twenty

Is there a chemical reaction that occurs in the brain when a king or unicorn decides? Or is it just a confluence of circumstances that push one in this direction or that...? Like tumblers in the mechanisms of a clock, a decision changes everything.

Something moved the King to a decision.

First, there was a hint that changes were coming. Then, the Official Announcement:

"I was going to wait to do this at home, but it would be late and I might as well tell it now..."

And the decision fell into place.

I'll be changing the rules tonight to mention: "Treat others as how you would treat yourself" and leave it at that.. No porn, no spammers, no posting personal information...

And from here on out, this is the forum theme song: Welcome To The Jungle

The stars looked brighter in the Kingdom's sky that night. The air smelled and felt sharp, clean, and dry like a storm had passed.

The Unicorn Chronicles Chapter Nineteen

The unicorn herd had been drawn to the Kingdom promising freedom. The clashes at first came from those who were already in residence in the land. One of those was an ancient man who wore no shoes. Barefoot wanted to publish news from the north country. A couple of nudges from sarcastic unicorn horns and the one without shoes became hostile.

He used the magic private messenger to communicate his conclusions about the new arrivals:

"...the whole lot of you came to the kingdom with the
intention of destruction...I will say this if I had my drethers [sic] (my word) you would all be history."

Well, thank you for your welcome! Barefoot decided that freedom was not something with which he wanted to coexist and proceeded to commit suicide. He pulled the plug on his citizenship and even his posts disappeared from the communication machine.

How could one come to a conclusion that was more in error? Barefoot completely misunderstood the coming of the herd. Destruction was not one of the objectives that ever came into the consciousness of a single member of those that months before had decided to dwell in a new land.

Freedom is really scary to some. They run from it. They kill themselves to avoid it.

To Be Continued...

The Unicorn Chronicles Chaper Eighteen

Holy's silence did not go unnoticed by the King.

"Didn't mean you had to stop posting, just wanted things to be cleared up a little," the monarch said in another private message on the magic machine. "Don't have time right now to go further into it, but seems as though the drama has cleared for now," he penned hopefully.

No response by Holy. The King didn't recognize that silence was a part of the drama.

Another week passed. The King probed for some reaction to his messages.

"I know you've read my messages by now, and I see you haven't responded..
I don't want you to have any hard feelings with me, You're a smart person and I like a lot of stuff you say, even though some I don't always agree with, but I just want you to know I'm not the type person that if you get mad at me and say something in a private message that I will ban you or anything like that (I wouldn't ban you for it). I'd just like to have some sort of response or something to why you haven't responded to anything I have sent..."

While the Kingdom was still functioning, the spark and fire of unfettered communication were missing. Isn't that what happens when one dams the river of thought and ideas? Bland, uninteresting posts were the result. Uninterested readers of the magic machine followed.

But the river was about to flow again. It would happen because of a man who had no shoes.

To be continued...

The Unicorn Chronicles Chapter Seventeen

A week had passed since Holy had satirically pricked the King's son-in-law. Holy had made fun of the fact that the relative had linguistically and unconsciously cast dispersions on his ability by calling himself a "semi-pro." Holy didn't call him that. The relative called himself that. Holy's action was to humorously let Semi-Pro know that the words of his advertisement were sabotaging what he was attempting to accomplish. What Holy didn't know was that Semi-pro was not just any user of the magic machine, he was a member of the royal family. Like a hurt child on the recess playground Semi went crying to the teacher.

What followed demonstrated that Semi's unconscious use of words were the tip of an inferiority iceberg that lay unseen beneath the waters of his psyche. Semi-pro's reaction was disproportionate to the perceived offense and now days later the King was having to carry the water for Semi-Pro, his wife Lycra, and Lycra's mother,the Queen.

In his private message to Holy, the King said, "As far as the Semi/Lycra issue, they are still hurt over the whole thing, and the Queen is too... It really insulted me as well..."

The King then suggested a resolution that included a phrase that exacerbated the issue by implying his expected response. "As far as what I would like to see happen, I'm quite sure this wouldn't happen, but it would be a nice gesture to apologize to Semi-pro,and it would be even nicer to apologize to Lycra, too.. He might not be a professional photographer - He finds it as a hobby.. Just like this website is a hobby of mine."

Then the ruler attempted an analogy to bolster his argument, "I'm going to ask you to look at it this way.....Say you created a website its new..It has a forum, with a few people checking it out.. Say you advertised that website on al.com, and I responded to your advertisement saying "ahh its obvious you're new at this, check out mine, I'm a professional".. And then say the Queen was a moderator of the forum that was my buddy, and responds saying "hahaha good one King".. Wouldn't you be insulted?

Holy's answer as he read the argument on the magic machine was, "No." Not only would Holy not be insulted, he would think it was ridiculous that anyone else would be either.

The monarch of the New Kingdom finished his private communication with additional conclusions that he had drawn. "I really thought after reading a lot of your posts that you were a good guy, and I enjoyed reading your posts.. But after this incident, I've lost a lot of respect for you, especially considering that you don't find anything wrong with the way you handled it, and the way you kept questioning the way I run things.. I'm the type of person that likes to keep peace among others, and I found what you did was very childish, and it was completely unacceptable and there is no excuse for what you did. I doubt you'll apologize to them, because it seems as though you're the type that wouldn't apologize for anything.. I could be wrong, but that's the impression you've given me.

You might dislike me more after reading this, you might delete your account, or hopefully you'll see what I'm getting at and at least make some attempt to contact them and make amends. It takes a big person to do the right thing, I guess we'll find out."

Holy's response was days filled with the "sounds of silence."

To be continued...

The Unicorn Chronicles Chaper Sixteen

The King had a mad family and a bad back...not a good combination. It must have been a tough time in the palace. But in his private message, he continued to describe how he experienced Holy and the unicorn herd.

About Holy he wrote, "It really insulted me as well when you have kept questioning my decisions.."

By the time that message was written, the unicorns were in full fledged rebellion or at least heated disagreement with the way life in the New Kingdom was going. There was a definition problem with words like insults and name calling. What made for lively debate for the unicorn was frightening to those whose thoughts must have never been challenged. A unicorn horn had never pierced their set and settled ways. A different way of thinking was a threatening and fearful thing. To the unicorn the clash of ideas was a release. It was a way to stretch, grow, and learn. To think and analyze ideas and test them against the knowledge and experience of others was a thing of beauty and a wonderful way to live. The king was struggling with himself and others because he and they only wanted peace and tranquility.

Holy only questioned the King's decisions twice. He called "bull roar" on the angry reactions of Semi-pro and Lycra to his satirical wit and he responded to the King's request about new rules to bring peace to the Kingdom.

The King asked, "What do you all think of the idea of designating the forum and noting in the description that this forum and the politics forum that anyone who posts will be subject to criticism, and that if they aren't thick skinned, to stick to the other forums..What do ya'll think of that?"

Holy's response was quick and no doubt interpreted by the king as questioning his decision. But that was exactly what the King had asked the unicorns to do. "Holy thinks that is a TERRIBLE idea. The beauty of a public forum (ANY forum, not just the political one) with lots of diverse input is that the variety of thought creates a kind of self correcting mechanism. Criticism is a necessary part of that process. If fools are suffered gladly in ANY forum, they will remain fools and will try to run the asylum. In Holy's NEVER humble opinion, the fools tried to take over night before last."

Perhaps in the cacophony of reactions thrown at the King when he asked for help, he could only hear Holy's voice.

To be continued...

The Unicorn Chronicles Chapter Fifteen

The King and Queen might have thought that they were the ones in control, but in the New Kingdom the real ruler was confusion. The unicorn herd had leaped the chasm from the harshness of random censorship by the Vanishing Cream Patrol to find themselves in a land whose control was ever bit as loathsome because it clothed itself in deceit. The New Kingdom proudly boasted of deleting few messages from the magic machine. Instead the leadership tried to suppress the spirit. Rodney "I don't get no respect" Dangerfield had become the poster boy for the King and his family. Aretha Franklin would sing the Kingdom's national anthem.

Although things appeared to be calming on the surface, private messages began to flow on the magic machine that revealed to Holy that the issue that was causing the King to be out of sorts was family. Semi-pro, the King's son-in-law, had been "insulted" by the dustup with Holy over his wares. Lycra, the King's daughter had come to her husbands defense by saying Holy wasn't "cool" and was wounded too when Holy didn't roll over and die The Queen took it personally and the King soon followed. Holy had nailed what was really going on in the Kingdom when he had asked the question, ""Could this be an issue of blood is thicker than water?" Holy had poked the King's family members with a humor stick and now the whole unicorn herd was having to pay for it.

The King sent Holy three private messages. The first was a rewritten missive that was originally meant for someone else. After a brief explanation of of his concern for the message machine's "direction" that including words like "respect" and "tone it down", he said that he had asked the one who monitored the magic machine "...to please make a post for everyone...in hopes that we wouldn't have to go to each person that had said things that really didn't need to be said publicly, and also to ask everyone to be respectful towards each other, whether they agree or disagree with another person's feelings or opinions." The King said the monitor "...turned it around and said that I wanted her to censor anyone and everyone if they posted something I didn't want to see, which is entirely untrue."

Next the King came to the crux that Holy had already identified as the real problem. He said, "...there was an issue between Semi-pro, Lycra, and Holy, where Semi-pro had posted in the for sale/trade forum advertising and offering to do a side job as a photographer. In his original post, he stated that he was a semi-professional, and he also listed a couple of websites that has some of his work that he has done in the past, so people could get an idea of the work that he can do and does do. After he posted that, Holy responded back, making a gesture that came across to me, The Queen, Semi-pro, and Lycra, that poked fun at Semi-pro, pretty much saying that he's an amateur, and if someone wanted a real photographer, to check his sites out and listed the site address... What that sounded like to me, along with the others I mentioned, was insulting Semi-pro. Semi-pro in no way, shape, or form did anything to try to offend anyone on these forums, but was highly offended at the insult. The moderator at this point jumped into the post and said "hahaha good one Holy", and then when Lycra responded, she said that what just happened was "not cool" and was insulting. Moderator then turned around saying its a capitalist world, and basically defended Holy, when in fact, Holy should never have made that comment. After Lycra has mentioned what she did about Holy being rude and that his post was uncalled for, he then again posted another insulting comment." (Editor's note: To see Holy's description of these events, see Chapters Six, Seven, and Eight of The Unicorn Chronicles.)

To Be Continued...

The Unicorn Chronicles Chapter Fourteen

Questions were flying everywhere and explanations were attempted as chaos began to fill the vacuum of the unknown in the New Kingdom. The explanations only added to the confusion. The illusion of a kingdom where free speech would be allowed to roam with no fear of censorship had crumbled into disillusionment.

"This isn't an issue about censorship.. One post was deleted by the originating poster's request regarding a selling of wares.. Insults were thrown.. There have also been some insults thrown in another forum that are hurting some people," the King said.

Holy could not believe it and said so into the magic machine. "Holy says, 'Bullroar!'

"If ANYONE calls what happened in marketing communications 'throwin insults', Holy challenges them to a marshmallow fighting contest because their sensitivities are not able to withstand the slings and arrows of ACTUAL verbal warfare."

Then Holy asked the question that he believed got to the core of what was really happening in the kingdom and in the palace. "Could this be an issue of blood is thicker than water? Holy bets that the answer is 'Yes.' Is he right?."

The King answered cryptically, "I think it would be best for me not to say what I was going to say publicly at this time. but you can send me a private message for details if you'd like. My advice, beware of who friends who are on here, because a lot of people have been deceived."

"Holy prefers to communicate in the fresh air rather than under the cover of private messages. Anything he has put in a PM he could publish on the board. He also does not care for ulterior transactions that carry hidden messages. Now, after saying all of that, what in the world does THIS mean: 'beware' of 'friends' who are on here, because a lot of people have been deceived?'"

The king did not answer. Another was sent to reply. The responses were equally oblique, "...there's just some really raw feelings this morning and some lingering feelings of having been played. It happens when you find out someone you thought had your best interests at heart only has self interests in mind and is prepared to serve self interest at any cost...[semi-pro] was made uncomfortable (due to previous incidents) by some of the remarks made after your post, and the King decided to honor his request and to get rid of the whole thread."

Holy was still confused and decided that he may have to remain so because no one seemed to be able to explain what had "gone down." All explanations had left the air filled with debris that obstructed clarity. Holy wanted to call someone a "wuss", but so far he could only guess at the target.

To be continued...

The Unicorn Chronicles Chapter Thirteen

The King decreed, " Ok look, the drama needs to end. Everyone really needs to calm down and let things go.. This has gone too far.. All I'm asking is that people just treat each other with RESPECT.. That is all..

Rodney Dangerfield had become the New Kingdom's mascot with Aretha Franklin singing the Kingdom's national anthem.

The Queen chimed in with her agreement with the King, "All we are saying really is for everyone to let it die down. Its old and tiresome and over and we just wanna forget it happened and not open a topic and find the topic of this is still lingering. Just time to move on and put it behind us."

The King, "It really makes no sense why people are leaving over being asked to tone things down and respect each other.. That's all this is over and they're making a huge deal out of it. That's messed up. It's sad that people blow things so out of proportion when simply asked to not be so harsh/rude to people.. There were a lot of good posts, a lot of good topics, but people need to be respectful, that's all that is asked.. There hasn't been any censorship..Just asking that people don't say things that are hurtful to others isn't too much to ask, is it?"

Then the rules started coming."I have updated the new Terms of Service / Forum Guidelines, which I need everyone here to read. The moderators WILL be enforcing this, And we will soon be implementing a warning plan, so that if a user has broken the rules, depending on the severity of the offense, they may receive a warning, or if the offense is severe enough, the offender may receive a temporary ban to cool off. If a person has been warned or banned, it will be noted on this database, and if a person continues to break the rules within a certain time period, depending on what has occurred, it may lead to another temporary ban, up to a permanent ban on the person's account."

The explanation was that the new signs posted in the Kingdom were, "just a written out version of the 'unwritten' rules we already had"

Then the King asked the subjects, "If anyone has any suggestions regarding the forums, adding anything to the guidelines, changing the wording of some of the guidelines, or anything else related to the site and/or the forums, please let me know"

Holy provided "Music for the Fallen" with the comment, "Nothing like the Broadway stage to provide words to frame our existence...even our cyberspace existence."

To Be Continued...

The Unicorn Chronicles Chapter Twelve

When the Blazer left the New Kingdom she said, "I just hate to promise people something and not be able to deliver. I promised you all a censorship free forum but that's not the case anymore."

The King's first words concerning the issues being discussed in his kingdom appeared as the night ended and held hope that censorship was not the issue. "I promise you that as long as it stays clean, you don't have to worry about your thoughts and opinions and stances on things being deleted. My belief is that everyone is entitled to their opinion, and I want everyone to feel welcome to post it here, without worry of being censored."

Had Holy's posts already been erased? The Kingdom's characterizations of his posts are not true and their removal IS censorship.

***Modified for insulting/inappropriate***

**Modified for insulting and name calling which was inappropriate and quite immature***

Holy's posts were not "modified." They were gone.

By the end of the next day the King was saying, "We are all people. We all have opinions. Not everyone is going to agree with everyone else's opinion. There is no need for racism in private messages or in the forums, and there is no need to insult others.. It is ridiculous... Can we stop this nonsense and move along now?"

And then: "It's sad that people blow things so out of proportion when simply asked to not be so harsh/rude to people.. There were a lot of good posts, a lot of good topics, but people need to be respectful, that's all that is asked.. There hasn't been any censorship..Just asking that people don't say things that are hurtful to others isn't too much to ask, is it?

Things were obviously heating up in the hidden halls of the palace.

Members of the unicorn herd who had been away from the magic machine during the night were surprised when they logged into the system on the first of October.

Fedup said, "What'd I miss, what'd I miss??? I know Val got all offended by my "foul" language...hehe.. she evidently doesn't know foul language... and now I see PB has jumped ship. And why is crimson croc's name black?"

Redarmy exclaimed, "I could stay on here 24/7 ,get up to go P and miss all the good stuff"

Instead of allowing things to calm down on their on, the King began to issue proclamations:

"There's been some bullying going on as of late, people throwing insults, cursing at others, etc.. It needs to stop..Please just police yourselves and recognize the difference between debate and insulting...Everyone needs to respect everyone and talk to each other like you're talking to your mother or father...

There's just been a few people lately that have gotten their feelings hurt and everyone really needs to be more sensitive.. Its a harsh world but some people just cant take a lot and we want to accommodate everyone so we just need to not be so hard on people..."

The Queen even joined the fray:

"My Family was hurt as well as myself and i really don't know what to say about it. But this being ugly to each other has to end. There has been too much of it here lately and we are losing a lot of good people and a lot of our good people are getting hurt and won't talk about it."

Then came the transaction that caused the Crimson Croc to leave. He asked the King, "Is there something you are trying to tell us while trying not to tell us? If this is some sort of carry-over from someone's "leaving" because they got their feelings hurt, I suggest you are "lecturing" the wrong folks..."

The King sounded like Rodney King when he answered. "There's just been a few people lately that have gotten their feelings hurt and everyone really needs to be more sensitive.. Its a harsh world but some people just cant take a lot and we want to accommodate everyone so we just need to not be so hard on people...I want us all to get along"

That was it for the Croc. "I'm sorry, King...that's not the way the real world works...so...it was nice while it lasted...all my friends know how to contact me...stay in touch..." And he was gone.

Scar tried to get information about the specific post that caused the problem. If it was the one where Valedictorian couldn't take it, Scar said, "...this admonishment is a major overreaction. If that thread is the one that is the culprit, here, then this is looking like a slippery slope that I'll be stepping off of, because, personally, I didn't find anything offensive about it. It's your kingdom, do what you want, but if the offend-o-meter is going to be set that low, then I'll go ahead and take my leave, also."

A rebellion was brewing over the very thing that had looked so promising in the New Kingdom. The King started trying to explain that private messages were arriving at the palace from many sources and about many subjects. "Its kinda a mixture of a lot of posts that have been building up and there have been some really racist remarks that have been made.. I'm just asking that all the racist stuff ends, that people will respect each other, and let things be.. Debate as you wish, but don't go over the edge and pull dirty tactics.."

Scar's reaction was quick and to the point. "So, you're not even sure where you read some racists comments, but just to be on the safe side, you decide to chastise some grown-ups who were saying absolutely nothing wrong? Is that about right? Wow, we've gone from plain old everyday political correctness to preemptive political correctness. Nice work."

"I was just saying for everyone to respect each other, and stop the nonsense.. Its that simple."

After the proclamations came the rules.

To Be Continued...

The Unicorn Chronicles Chapter Eleven

Valedictorian took her football and left the New Kingdom.

Blazer who had shown the unicorn herd the location of the land that was different from the Dark Place said, "Wow, I can't believe you all ran Val off." Then she attempted a sociological defense with a description of how Val was reared.

The response was predictable. Others in the group felt that Val could not accept the reality that others did not agree with her positions.

"Oh my aching butt," wrote Crimson Croc. "...anyone who plays the 'victim card' as much as she does, does not need to be in a forum with adults...or maybe even in the 'real world'...the statement that she would not post her opinion because she would be 'argued against' is very telling...and her Romper Room, in-your-face, non-responses with her cute little icons to perfectly viable posts were extremely childish...maybe she will grow up and come back..."

Holy remembered that one of the original settlers,like Val, had recently left for an equally ridiculous reason and said, "Let's see, barefoot didn't want anybody to talk about breast milk and now a mild epithet from Fed sends another one packin'. Come on, Blazer. This woman has lived in New Orleans at school by herself. Please don't try to tell us she has lived in some kind of bubble. Will everyone please post all their sensibilities so Holy won't step on any toes?"

Then the Blazer was gone, too.

And the King stepped into the fray. Things were happening in the halls of the palace.
The first result of the intrigue was that Crimson Croc, one of the herds strongest, was gone, too.

It was night in the Kingdom. Less than twelve hours had passed. As the sun rose on the first day of October, the rays would reveal leadership that was confusing, arbitrary,and capricious. To Holy the landscape looked familiar. The New Kingdom was becoming almost exactly like the Dark Place.

To be continued...